Relationships Archives
Most of us work hard; we’ve families to support, debts to pay, and a retirement to prepare for. But for some, it seems like work is the only focus; they work for 12 or more hours a day and six to seven days a week, regardless of their partner’s feelings on the matter. After all, they seem to be saying, all the work they’re doing is ultimately for the family, right? Wrong. Studies have shown that spending…
Romantic relationships need open communication without defensive reactions. When defensiveness in relationships shows up in subtle or frequent ways, conversations may turn into power struggles, and emotional distance grows. People often try to protect themselves from discomfort, yet this pattern creates more tension instead of relief. The topic matters because these habits influence connection, emotional safety, and long-term relationship health. Understanding Defensiveness in Relationships Dr. John Gottman researched relationship dynamics and identified four behaviors that signal serious trouble.…
Believe it or not, the holiday season is just around the corner. While most of us look forward to this time of year, it can also be a difficult season for many of us. For couples, in particular, it can be a time of contradictions. On the one hand, it is a time to connect, celebrate, and share our gratitude and love toward one another. On the other hand, however, the holiday season can generate a great…
Couples seek out therapy for many reasons, but one of the most common is to help their relationship recover from an infidelity. In fact, some research suggests that 30% of couples seek out therapy due to the damage of an affair, and couples who have experienced an affair are more likely to break up or divorce than those couples where there was no infidelity. These couples often feel as though the very foundation of their relationship has…
We all have bad days with our partner. We fight, act badly, and say things we don’t mean. At times we lose our ability to self-soothe, think logically, and treat our loved one well. For healthy couples, however, these missteps are addressed and resolved respectfully. In a healthy relationship, partners genuinely apologize, learn from their mistakes, and integrate this new knowledge into their relationship in a meaningful way. It can be easy to see where you and…
Is your partner struggling with an anxiety disorder? In a given year, anxiety disorders affect about 40 million Americans, or about 18% of the adult population, according to the National Institute of Mental Health. When you suffer from an anxiety disorder, your life is filled with a sense of fearfulness and uncertainty. Worries plague your life, making it difficult to engage in daily tasks and enjoy yourself. The more we know about anxiety, however, the more we…
Many of us take time off of work during the summer to get away, disconnect from work, and spend time with the ones we love. We often feel more in touch with ourselves and our relationships when we take this time to be together. Once the long summer days fade away, however, it can feel like we enter a slump where the work days take over again, and the time when spend with our partners and loved…
When you and your partner argue, it can sometimes feel like you have no choice but to react. When she gets defensive, so do you. And you just can’t stand it when he walks away from you, so you yell a little louder in order to make sure he is really listening. Indeed, our partners can unwittingly trigger our most tender, vulnerable spots, making it difficult to keep cool and think logically. However, these automatic reactions may…
Arguments and disagreements are natural in every relationship. The way partners handle them can shape whether love grows or breaks down. Many couples adopt habits that seem logical in the moment but ultimately cause more harm than good. These repeated patterns create more distance and leave both partners feeling unheard. That is why identifying and moving away from unhealthy relationship strategies is a key step toward a better connection. Conflict is about choosing the right approach when…
It is not always easy to communicate well with your partner, and it is more complicated than simply an exchange of words. Communicating with your partner is about relating to him or her; it is about two people openly sharing who they are with one another in ways that are not critical or judgmental. It can be difficult, however, to say what you mean or share what you are feeling, especially when you know that what you…