Relationships Archives
What is Intimacy? When we hear or think about the word intimacy, we are often met with the idea of sex. While this can be true, intimacy is very multi-dimensional and can mean many different things. Intimacy is defined by the American Psychological Association as “an interpersonal state of extreme emotional closeness such that each party’s personal space can be entered by any of the other parties without causing discomfort to that person…and requires the parties to…
Dating around can be exciting, but it can also be genuinely overwhelming. At some point with someone new, the question shifts from “is this fun” to something bigger: should I date them, really, as in commit to seeing where this goes? That’s a real decision, and it deserves more than a gut feeling made at 11 p.m. after a good text exchange. If you’re still turning over should I date them right now, here are five things…
Madissyn Fredericks, Licensed Professional Counselor, Symmetry Counseling Infatuation is a strong, overwhelming, and powerful feeling that most of us have felt at some point. You’ve just met the “perfect” person, and you’ve fallen head over heels for them. You’d give anything to be with this person, you get butterflies every time you think about them, and everything feels like a fairytale. If that sounds familiar, you may be experiencing symptoms of infatuation. The intensity of it can…
Feeling helpless is not something that feels good. It feels inhuman. To be helpless is seen as weak, to forego control. When the feeling grows too large, it can inspire depression or avoidant disorders like alcoholism or other types of addiction. Until you can accept feeling helpless or find a way to gain control, you feel lost. Yet we put ourselves in situations where we are helpless all the time. We surround ourselves with loved ones who…
Joining finances with another person is a very intimate process, and many partners are unprepared for this transition following marriage. Money is one of the most frequent categories of couple conflict and also one of the most detrimental, tending to last longer and be experienced more harshly than other types of conflict. This is an unfortunate pattern given that discussions of money are inevitable in relationships, and they cannot be avoided or subverted forever. Our financial beliefs…
Love exists in many forms that complement a variety of relationships. Think of the love you feel for your partner versus the love you feel for a friend, relative, pet, or hobby. It is restrictive to think that there is a “right” kind of love to strive for, which may lead you farther astray from the type of feeling you desire in a relationship. For example, if you think that you must not love your partner of…
Being single is often viewed as a problem to be fixed. It carries a negative connotation and is often referred to as “being alone.” When you tell people you’re not in a relationship, they automatically start listing off their single friends they could set you up with or tell you “things will get better.” It is assumed that if you’re single, you must not be happy. And maybe you’re not, but that doesn’t have to define your…
There are toxic people in all of our lives, whether we are close to them or not. “Toxic” means someone who hurts you more than they help you, and tends to subtract from your life rather than add to it. This can be friends, family members, significant others, or even bosses or coworkers.
The art of a good apology is difficult to perfect, and is not a widely known or practiced craft. Apologies are very vulnerable- it requires that you humble yourself to another person. It may be embarrassing to own up to your wrongs, causing you to want to talk about it as little as possible and hope it goes away. You may feel like apologizing to someone will give the person some power over you, or make you…
The end of a romantic relationship can be like riding a roller coaster of emotions. Depending on the circumstances, you may be feeling relieved, heart-broken, resentful, or shocked. It may seem like the road ahead is unclear for you, and it can be difficult to know how to “get past” this difficult time in your life. It is easy to focus on the negatives at this stage. Although it may feel insurmountable, you can help yourself to…