Live Better. Love Better. Work Better.

Blog

Categories

Money Scripts

June 22, 2016

We all have certain views, opinions, and beliefs about money that influence our thoughts, behaviors, and emotions around spending, saving, debt, worth, and our relationship with money. During our lives we have come to form these beliefs based on what we were taught within our families growing up, often passed down from generation to generation, our own personal experiences, societal views and opinions, and social influences. In Financial Therapy, these assumptions or views about money are referred…

Read More

Finding Comfort with the Grey Zone

June 15, 2016

Black or white. All or nothing. Right or wrong. Left or right. Yes or no. Republican or Democrat. Rich or poor. City or country. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. The world is full of dichotomies, situations, and labels in which there appear to be only two options available, where we feel we have to pick one or the other and stick to it. But in reality there is a whole spectrum or range of…

Read More

Money Talk, It’s Time to End the Taboo

June 8, 2016

Let’s be honest, we need money to live. Even the basic functions of living: air, water, and food, require some amount of money and spending to be able to obtain them and maintain our lives. Add in the need for clothing and shelter and there is no way one can argue that money isn’t a key component of and a necessity of life. We may not want to acknowledge it or give money such “power,” but it is a basic fact of life. Despite the inherent necessity of money in our lives, we treat it like a dirty little secret, a horrible habit, or a disgusting disease that we refuse to acknowledge or talk about. Why is money considered such a taboo topic to talk about overall, and even with people close to us or in confidential settings?

Read More

Live in the NOW

May 31, 2016

Do you ever get to where you are going and realize you don’t remember walking or driving there? Do you have conversations with other people but can’t remember what was said afterwards? Do you eat meals but don’t really pay attention to what you are eating or how it tastes? Does the end of the day come and you don’t really remember what you did or feel like you accomplished anything you set out to? Do you…

Read More

Me vs. Us: Balancing the Need for Self-Care in a Relationship

May 26, 2016

Couple therapists talk a lot about the importance of creating quality time for your relationship. What often gets less attention is the equally high value of establishing time for yourself. There is great variability in the balance of independence within romantic relationships. Partners will not always share the same preferred dose of dependency, and it is a task for any relationship to communicate openly about each other’s needs and develop a dynamic that respects both preferences. It…

Read More

Seven Potentially Deadly Symptoms in Intimate Relationships

May 24, 2016

People are creatures of habit. An ability to go on autopilot helps us conserve energy and stay alert to the unfamiliar. In relationships, it is our responsibility to remain attentive and proactive in nurturing our partner’s needs and addressing any problematic habits that may form slowly over time. Here is an overview of potentially problematic symptoms that can develop in intimate relationships. Use your increased awareness to take control and purposefully establish healthy relationship dynamics. 1. Keeping…

Read More

Don’t Underestimate the Power of the Therapeutic Alliance

May 24, 2016

“How do I find a therapist?” “What makes him/her good?” “What should I research about them?” “What’s the most important thing to know about finding a therapist?” “How will I know if this therapist can help me or not?” As a mental health therapist, I am often asked questions like these from friends, family, colleagues, or even initial clients when considering or starting therapy. Most people believe that there are certain criteria or a checklist to have…

Read More

“Don’t Tell Me to Calm Down!” How to Help Someone Who is Angry, Anxious, or Stressed

May 19, 2016

“Calm down.” “Just relax.” “Don’t worry about it.” “Stop stressing out.” “It will be fine.” “Don’t get so upset.” We have all probably been told these phrases, or something similar, by another person when we were angry, anxious, or stressed. We may even ourselves be guilty of saying them to another person. But did it help? Most likely not at all, and more likely it just made us, or the other person, angrier, more anxious, or even…

Read More

Don’t Say Yes When You Want to Say No

May 11, 2016

We all have times in our lives, sometimes more than we want, when we are asked to do something, give something, or help with something that we don’t want to but yet we say yes anyway. There are somethings we do or agree to because it will help someone, make them happy, or it is a fair compromise, and does not have a negative impact on our emotions or well-being. But what about those times when you…

Read More

The Ugly Truth of Being in a Wedding

May 4, 2016

Wedding season is upon us once again. Many view weddings as a time to celebrate, honor one’s love and commitment to their partner, bring family and friends together, and be a happy time for all involved. But there is a dark side to weddings that is often not talked about or is ignored, and that is the financial pressure it puts on all. Weddings are a costly event. The individuals getting married usually prepare in advance, have…

Read More