Taking Time Apart

Madissyn Fredericks, Licensed Professional Counselor

When you fall in love with someone you just can’t seem to get enough of them. Before you know it you are spending most of your free time going on dates, visiting family or friends, running errands, or staying in together. After awhile one or both of you may begin to feel like you need some time to yourself. While it can sound dramatic to “take some space” from your partner, it can actually be beneficial to the relationship. Many interpret the idea of taking time apart as the relationship having issues, however, prioritizing a brief time for yourself and your partner allows you to recharge and engage in individual self care. Try taking some time for yourselves and you will see the good it can do for both you and the relationship. Below are a few reasons it can be beneficial to your relationship to take a short time apart from each other.

Maintains Individuality

It is true that some people can lose themselves in romantic relationships. They will drop their friends, bail on plans, or give up the things they enjoy to be with their partner. Taking time apart from each other allows you both to prioritize other relationships in your life and maintain your independence. Spending brief amounts of time together can force you both to embrace your “single self” and do things you used to enjoy on your own. This could be exercise, reading, family time, girls/boys weekends, video games, baths, etc. Doing things for yourself makes you happy and will make you a better partner.

Allows Self-Care Time For Your Partner as Well

Not only do you get to maintain your independence but so does your partner. Spending so much time together can put extra pressure on your partner to complete your happiness. Relying on your partner for too much can lead to unhealthy dating patterns where you may feel insecure, lost, or jealous. These emotions and expectations can be overwhelming for both you and your partner and resentment can begin to build. Therefore, it is important to not only prioritize your self-care and independence but your partner’s as well.

Makes You Miss Each Other

Leaving for a couple hours or days you start to miss the other person. When you miss your partner you focus on what you love about them and helps you reflect on the positives in your relationship rather than what is bothering you. During this time you are rejuvenating and looking forward to reuniting. Being able to take care of yourself, maintain independence, and miss your partner are all components of a healthy relationship. Taking time apart doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed, it means you are preventing it from becoming toxic.

If you are finding it difficult to prioritize space in your relationship and would like some support, it may be useful to connect with a therapist. Contact Symmetry Counseling at 312-578-9990 to set up an appointment with one of our very skilled therapists today!