Getting Through A Difficult Heartbreak
Madissyn Fredericks, Licensed Professional Counselor, Symmetry Counseling
Every breakup takes it toll one way or another but there are certain heartbreaks that leave you feeling utterly devastated. During this kind of heartache it seems impossible to eat, sleep, see people, or even be happy or laugh. All you really want to do is isolate from others, cry, avoid the situation, and potentially try to “just try to move on”. While healing your heart is a different process for everyone, it is important you find the path that suits you. The path you take to get through this time isn’t going to be easy, but there are things that you can do to make getting through a difficult heartbreak more bearable. Below are some common strategies that may help you feel better and progress forward after you have had your heart broken.
Allow Yourself To Feel
Nurturing a broken heart takes a lot of time, energy, and reflection. You or your friends may tell you to “just get over it”, but it is important that you are patient with yourself. Take the time you need to face the feelings of sadness, guilt, anger, and hurt before trying to move forward. Allow yourself cry, journal, vent to friends, and most importantly, feel. Being patient with yourself will help you fully heal rather than simply pushing down emotions that will get brought back up later.
Be Honest With Yourself
There are often residual desires to get back together, get closure, or reconcile. While it is very common and normal to have hopes such as these, they can set you back if the relationship is truly over. For example, if you have these subconscious hopes you may continue to expect things that aren’t going to happen. These hidden expectations can be detrimental to your healing process if not addressed. Therefore, be honest with yourself, how you are feeling, and what you hope to happen.
Consider The Takeaways
There is something to learn from every relationship you engage in. While you may not be able to immediately understand why this relationship didn’t work out you can later reflect back on it. Consider both the good and bad times you had together, what you wish was different, what you enjoyed, how you have grown, and what you learned. Finding the takeaways from the relationship helps you forgive yourself, and others, and move forward.
Take Care of Yourself
While it may seem appealing to lay in bed and binge watch the hottest Netflix show make sure you continue taking care of yourself physically and emotionally. Go for a run to get anger and anxiety out, journal, socialize with friends, clean your space, forgive yourself and others, dedicate some time to yourself, and heal. Engaging in things that fill you up will help you along in the healing process and lessen the hurt even if it is just a little.
If you are finding it difficult to get through a breakup and would like some support, it may be useful to connect with a therapist. Contact Symmetry Counseling at 312-578-9990 to set up an appointment with one of our very skilled therapists today!

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