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When someone we love – a partner, friend, coworker, or family member – dies, the aftermath can be one of the most challenging experiences of our life. Indeed, when someone you care about it taken away, it can bring about a difficult grieving process that, although natural, can feel hopeless, scary, lonely, and painful. Whether sudden or a long dying process, the death of a loved one can feel like one of the most overwhelming experiences we…
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Expectations are attitudes and behaviors that we expect from other people. We are taught – explicitly and implicitly – that there are standards of behaviors, what we call the norms, when it comes to how we should treat each other. We see it being modeled in our family, and we also see it in school, in our community and the workplace, on TV and other media including the Internet. It’s normal to have expectations for all of…
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If you’ve ever had your heart broken, you know how painful it can be. There are times when the pain is so bad it becomes physical. Memories of happy times pop up uninvited anytime during the day, making you feel really sad and alone. One day you may feel ok, but then you wake up in the middle of the night badly missing your ex. The yearning can be intense. It may be hard to believe now,…
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You’ve been hurt badly – by a spouse, a family member, a friend. What they did left a lasting effect on you. Sometimes you don’t know how you have survived the hurt and the pain; there are even times where you’re not sure that you have survived it. You talk about what happened to your spiritual adviser, your therapist, your support system, and one thing they may tell you is to forgive the offender. ‘Forgive and you…
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Maybe you’ve noticed something different in your partner. He or she may be acting sadder than usual, may not be taking pleasure in the things that he or she usually enjoys, or may even be talking about death a lot. It could be your partner just down in the dumps, or these symptoms could be pointing to something much more serious – depression. While it’s normal to be sad, especially when there’s loss involved, depression is a…
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Therapy is a highly effective tool for managing life’s many twists and turns. It can help you develop insight and change that brings you closer to a life that you want to live, full of meaningful relationships and self-love. Just because therapy can help does not mean that you always know what to expect during the therapeutic process. Everyone experiences therapy somewhat differently, but one of the common aspects of most therapy treatments that both client and…
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How do you interact with a romantic partner? Take a minute and ask yourself: Are you usually clingy and possessive? Do you have a tendency to push your partners away? Or are you comfortable with both giving and receiving love to your partner? This pattern of thinking, feeling, and behaving towards someone we’re in a relationship with is called an attachment style. There have been numerous studies conducted on attachment, many of which have consistently shown that…
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When it comes to relationships, we have been told again and again that it’s better to love others more than you love yourself. Sacrificing yourself is said to be the best way to show your love for someone. However, when we consistently put another’s needs before our own to our detriment, the relationship may be based upon a codependency; that is, the relationship stops being healthy when you start prioritizing others’ needs at the cost of your…
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Having financial discussions can be awkward between couples, much more so for those who are about to get married. After all, we are raised to believe that people are supposed to marry for love, not for money. Many research studies, however, have shown that money is the top source of tension in relationships, and not talking about it before the wedding could be a big and lasting mistake. In addition to marriage being an emotional and romantic…
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For most of us, from a young age we are taught – either directly or indirectly – that we know we are good, right, or valuable if our actions or personal characteristics are in line with those around us. We compare ourselves against classmates and co-workers, social and cultural norms, what is portrayed in the media, and based on what our family legacies tell us we ought to do or who we should be. Sometimes, these comparisons…
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