Which Soulmate are You Looking For?

Soulmate

With romantic relationships, many people search for a partner that is different than the rest. Someone who just gets you, and someone who will love you unconditionally. People search for their soulmate. However, the way the term soulmate is used today differs greatly from where it originated, and partners can become significantly constrained from finding…

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A Therapist’s Guide to Writing Your Wedding Vows

For many couples, writing wedding vows can feel like a daunting task. What do you want to say to a crowd of loved ones about your future spouse? How do you capture it all? While there is certainly no “right” or “wrong” way to approach writing and reciting wedding vows, it might behoove brides and…

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The Successful Blended Family

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Three (or Four) questions for Anne Brennan Malec about Remarriage Okay, I am not anywhere near the stage of remarriage, let alone re-falling madly in love. Nor are most of us, at least in the immediate aftermath of divorce. But it hovers out there—the aspiration to meet someone new, recommit, perhaps remarry. We’ve all heard…

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Something’s Gotta Give: Managing Anger in Your Relationship

All relationships experience some level of conflict, and what often comes with conflict is anger. At its core, anger is a secondary emotion, meaning it is a reaction to a primary emotional response. Common primary emotions that trigger anger are hurt, fear, pain, or rejection. Anger can develop as an automatic response to these perceived…

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A Workaholic’s Guide to Simple Self Care

Self care means intentionally prioritizing your own basic needs for health, relaxation, stress reduction, and the pursuit of personal interests. While this term may connote shirking responsibilities so that you can spend a day at the spa, it simply means being aware that without recharging your own batteries, you will burn out or perhaps suffer…

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Lessons in Love: Expressions of Love

Expressions of Love

It is one thing to love and quite another to feel loved. Without feeling loved, you may become disillusioned with your partner and your relationship. To make your partner feel loved and appreciated, it is essential to understand how best to express love so that your partner can feel it and to be open with…

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A Newlywed’s Guide to Setting Realistic Marriage Expectations

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You have said, “I do,” signed the marriage license, and perhaps even celebrated your wedding with family and friends. With all the hard work of planning and executing a wedding behind you, now is the time to sit back, relax, and enjoy life as a married couple, right? The truth, of course, is that this…

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Lessons in Love: Love is Dynamic

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Love exists in many forms that complement a variety of relationships. Think of the love you feel for your partner versus the love you feel for a friend, relative, pet, or hobby. It is restrictive to think that there is a “right” kind of love to strive for, which may lead you farther astray from…

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Love is Conditional: Busting Relationship Myths

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There are numerous stereotypes about love, relationships, and marriage, and some of them have formed into broadly shared myths. Unfortunately, couples can be led astray by myths that promote unhealthy relationship habits or prevent partners from adopting healthier styles of relating. Often in therapy, I work with couples to break down commonly held myths so…

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