Posts
By: Andrew McNaughton LCSW CADC A loved one’s addictive behavior can quickly become our own problem for which we make ourselves feel responsible. Whether the behavior involves alcohol, drugs, sex, gambling, pornography, eating, stealing, hoarding, or any other potentially destructive compulsions, when it becomes problematic for the individual, it will likely become a problem for their family and friends as well. Learning to cope with a loved one’s addictive behavior—both in and outside of individual or family therapy…
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In the July issue of Chicago Woman magazine, Symmetry Counseling founder and author of Marriage in Modern Life, Dr. Anne Brennan Malec offers a concise list of “Keys to a Successful Marriage.” This advice comes from her years of professional training and practice as a marriage and family therapist, as well as from her own personal observations and experiences. What follows are some suggestions for how to implement her useful advice. By: Dr. Anne Brennan Malec KEYS…
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Do you listen to your inner child? As adults, we often become preoccupied with our “adult” roles and forget that despite the aging process, we were all once children. Your inner child is within you no matter how old you are, and this part now depends on your adult self for nurturing. If you struggle with mental health issues, even if it’s not depression with a capital D, your inner child may benefit from more nurturing. Many…
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Situational mood problems like a temporary break up, money issue, or argument with a friend can seem devastating but anxiety or depression treatment can seem unfit at the time. Mood problems in general can create various types of distorted thinking like tunnel vision, all or nothing, and black and white thinking. I like to call this type of thinking “Rough Draft” thinking because it’s sloppy and not reflective of our entire strength and resilience. More specifically, the…
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Over the years, our culture has placed more and more emphasis on romantic love. Relationships and marriages used to occur out of convenience and obligation. As the times have changed for the better, marriages have become more about building a relationship with someone who you have chosen to be “your person.” Therefore, our society has placed more emphasis and meaning on romantic love, meaning romance and love are seen as the keys to a lasting relationship. We…
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By Andrew McNaughton LCSW CADC How we choose the words we use in expressing our thoughts to ourselves and others directly impacts how we make ourselves feel. I have previously addressed rational and irrational thinking in a previous blog, and this will expand on those concepts by demonstrating the benefit of exchanging the vocabulary of demands with preferences. The difference might, on the surface, seem slight, but the impact of our use of preferential instead of demanding…
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What is the most important relationship in your life? You might think it is your relationship with your significant other or your children or your parents. But the most meaningful relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself. Having a healthy relationship with yourself is the foundation upon which relationships with others are built. If you are deficient in nurturing this most significant relationship, your relationships with others will suffer. Before you seek…
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By Andrew McNaughton LCSW CADC Change is a process, and certainly not an easy one, but the benefits of making positive changes will almost certainly outweigh discomfort felt during the process. We are not, however, always prepared to dive into making changes, or are even able or ready to see that we could benefit from changing. Before attempting changes, it is useful to be able to identify how ready we are to begin to make them. This…
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If you’ve recently been to a yoga class or read a self-help book, you’re probably familiar with the term mindfulness. During therapy, your counselor may tell you to be mindful of your emotions or behavior in a particular situation. Numerous research studies continue to demonstrate that mindfulness based interventions provide stress reduction and overall symptom reduction for many mental health conditions, including anxiety. Yet, understanding how mindfulness can really help you and applying it in day-to-day life…
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As a marriage and family therapist, a question I often get asked is, “What is the most common issue you see in couples and marriage counseling sessions?” The answer, without a doubt, is communication issues. Couple after couple attend couples therapy and report that they have trouble communicating. Marriage and family therapists see common communication issues among couples that are the result of unhealthy and detrimental patterns and cycles, generally stemming from avoiding conflict or having trouble…
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