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Is Marriage Overrated?

September 15, 2019

I recently read an article by Mandy Len Catron called, ‘What You Lose When You Gain A Spouse.’ I have decided to reflect some of my own responses to this article as a way to explore the concept of marital loneliness. As someone who has grown up in a hetero-normative family with a Mom and Dad that are still happily married, this concept of marital loneliness was new to me. Of course, society has imprinted in our…

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Insomnia

September 14, 2019

I’m having another one of those nights. Some of you know what I’m talking about… Where will ”6” go for summer camp? Who will care for the twins while I’m at work? How will I grow my business? Will I ever achieve my goals? 6’s room is a mess; I won’t have time to clean it till Friday. As badly as I need sleep – As badly as I WANT to sleep – mom guilt and parenting…

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Playing a Game with No Winners: Blame

September 13, 2019

Steven Topper, LCPC Try a little game in the morning and see if you can go one whole day without blaming anyone, for anything. It may be harder than we’d think. Often in life we find ourselves wronged. It may be random strangers, friends, family, or significant others that have brought pain and wrongdoing. These experiences often lead to anger, frustration, disappointment, among many other uncomfortable emotions. It can be a painful and sobering experience, though our…

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Disconnecting from Others, Especially through Technology

September 12, 2019

With the world we live in today, we have a hard time disconnecting from all that is around us. We try to do “no technology days” or “no technology hours”, but everything is now on our phones. I feel like people do not own televisions or computers anymore because we can do everything that we used to do on a simple device that we can put in our pocket. Did you ever think we would get to…

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Coping with Your Own Anger

September 11, 2019

Anger is an emotion that we all have, but do we cope with it properly? We might see a partner or a friend or even a stranger act out in a way that we identify as anger, and we tend to say, “wow they are one angry person”. But what is the best way to actually cope with anger that is healthy and does not make us angrier or not feel better at the end of the…

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Healthy Coping Skills: What are They?

September 10, 2019

When we see our therapist or even people surrounding us, they often ask, “What are some coping skills that you use?” You might say: reading, journaling, meditation, cooking, self-care, etc, but what exactly is a coping skill and how do we know it is helping us? There are two types of coping skills that therapists talk about: Problem-Focused Coping Skills and Emotion-Focused Coping Skills. So, what do these both mean and how do they differ? Problem-focused coping…

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Romantic Rejection: The Aftermath and How to Heal

September 9, 2019

Rejection is one of the most emotionally painful experiences that we face as human beings. We can experience rejection in various settings – in our workplace, being rejected/not chosen for a job opportunity, in the school system, in friend groups, and in romantic relationships. Regardless of how you experience rejection, it is hurtful and it can leave you feeling alone and insecure. Rejection from a romantic partner can undoubtedly be the worst kind of rejection, and if…

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Simple Guide on How to Work While on Vacation

September 8, 2019

I work with many clients who are struggling with their work life balance, especially when they are looking forward to an upcoming vacation. My job as their clinical therapist is to help the clients understand the possible reasons why they are struggling to create this balance in their life, and also possible coping strategies to implement more work life balance. I recently read an article that touched on this very topic from Fast Company, “If you’re going…

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How Metaphors Set Traps, and How To Get Out

September 7, 2019

Steven Topper, LCPC My depression is too bad to leave the house. This anxiety is crippling me. Every time you do that I get overcome with anger and lash out. I can’t handle this. Each of these statements have a few things in common. One is that they’ve likely been said by many people, especially those of us suffering with immense pain in our lives. Each statement may look or feel slightly different, but they share this…

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Facing the Problem of Attention Seeking Behavior

September 6, 2019

Steven Topper, LCPC In recent years, a common and basic human behavior has come under scrutiny: attention seeking behavior. We hear this in many contexts, almost always negative: Oh, she’s just doing that for attention. People that engage in attention seeking behavior are often ostracized and told to knock it off. It could be beneficial for us to dive deeper into what this phrase truly means. We may be demonizing something that is fundamental to us humans,…

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