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Offering a good apology to someone may seem easy, but doing it right requires attention and care. Simply saying, “I’m sorry” does not necessarily absolve you from your mistake; truly conveying remorse involves much more. No matter the circumstances, we each need to take personal responsibility for our own actions, regardless of how the past or anyone else may have impacted our choice of behaviors. Communicating a sincere and thoughtful apology tells someone that you recognize the…

Over time, partners frequently lose the fervor they once had to understand and actively appreciate the other. This is partially due to simply knowing your partner better. After being with this person for so many years, day in and day out, you certainly learn a thing or two about your partner’s likes, dislikes, annoyances, and dreams. The danger in falling into this crevice of passivity is that you may miss important changes and opportunities for connection. Couples…

John Gottman is a well-known researcher of intimate relationships , and he developed a method of couple therapy based on many of his findings. One piece of his theory that recently received media attention is the significance of couple time in improving your relationship. Given that this is a concept I almost always bring up in my sessions with couples, I naturally took an interest in what Gottman identified as the ways you can use six hours…

“As challenging as it can feel, it is the responsibility of the approached partner to be willing to listen to the hurt partner’s request.” All relationships encounter points where one or both partners become irritated with the other. Ideally, many of these irritations are accepted as just part of the marriage deal. Just because your husband or wife does something that bothers you does not mean you need to bring it to his or her attention. Tolerating…

It is well documented that the transition to parenthood correlates with a precipitous drop in relationship satisfaction for new parents. This dip in perceived satisfaction largely persists until the children launch and leave home. While this trend is well supported by research, plenty of couples choose to undergo the transition to parenthood and many lack adequate resources to support the intimate or marital relationship through this period. The first step in combating this trend is awareness and…

Whether it is recognized or not, everyone has been a victim of emotional eating at one time or another. You’re feeling stressed answering a million messages at work and reach for the candy jar and start mindlessly munching. Perhaps you had a hard week and on Friday night you get home, order a pizza and devour almost the entire thing. Of course there’s the classic scene in romantic comedies where someone gets dumped and begins eating a…